A Fleeting Thought . . .

After working four days, Thursday through Sunday, it was nice to get a day off from work. After adopting an attitutde of “no expectations” when I walk into work has helped, thus far. Everyone does things different, everyday and though my bones want every part to control it, I simply can’t.

I went back to work on Tuesday working through Friday, as this will be my first weekend off.  There is an impending snow storm, which turned from “watch” to “warning” overnight. Snowfall details are still sketchy.  Last I looked they forecast less than an inch to up to 10 inches in some places.  This all starts this evening into tomorrow.  Obviously, I was hoping it would hit this weekend.

While the enviornment at work is different, it many ways it is not. Last night I had to hold my tongue. One resident reported to another CNA I was rude. Another resident had a wound I didn’t report to the nurse. Lastly, the attitude of my co-workers doesn’t help the situation at all.

So with all that said, there was a time on break last night where I thought about drinking. It’s been eleven days since my last drink. No thoughts, cravings or evening a wandering thought. However, last night while on break, with everything going on I had a fleeting thought.

It just lasted a couple of minutes. Then I remembered the taste of Budwiser (which I can’t stand anymore) and the way I felt afterward.  I just can’t and won’t go down that road. I’m already in a pit I’m trying to dig myself out, mostly financial. I have unresolved issues I have to deal with later but just right now.  Right now my concentration is not to pick up the drink. What I am going through is simply temporary, if I take it “One Day at a Time”.

I slept good last night despite the last week which was helpful.  This morning I feel refreshed to take whatever comes to me, especially at work. However, I’m not going to let things get out of control. Simplicity – that is my goal for today.

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