Let Go, Let God

Today I have nine months sober – my sobriety date is September 14, 2018. I am blessed to be where I’m at today which wouldn’t be possible if not for the program of Alcoholics Anonymous and a belief in a Higher Power. Yet, I do not forget what got me here nor do I stray, in any way, from what the program has taught me. Especially today because the first major event in my life, at least to me, is about to happen.

As mentioned before, many addicts don’t realize the damage we put our bodies through during our addiction – we don’t care of ourselves. I’m not ashamed to say I developed bad oral hygiene. No matter what I do today, the damage is done. Now I have resources available to me to get my health back in order, thus a trip to the oral surgeon to get some very badly teeth extracted.

For the last couple of days my anxiety level has been high at times. Yesterday I asked those to be to ensure there was a plan in place if I’m prescribed pain medication. There is already a procedure in place for distributing such medication, however my worry was actually getting it for the weekend. Here is the timeline:

  • 12:45 pm – taxi to Syracuse
  • 1:45 pm – appointment with oral surgeon for seven teeth to be extracted
  • 3:45 pm (assumption) leave dental office
  • 4:45 or later (due to traffic) – arrive home

Once I get out of surgery, I will have the dental office call my residential program to inform them my prescription (whatever it is) was sent to the pharmacy. The problem arises when I get home will someone make an effort to pick up my prescription at all. My fear – having to deal with extreme pain all weekend long.

My trust in the staff at this program is at a low. It took them four days to pick up refills at the pharmacy this week. Typically they run to the pharmacy at least every other day if not every day. However, the answer I always get was, “I was informed of anything…” Complete BS! While I have moved beyond this, you can understand my concern.

This morning, I have no anxiety. I took a walk, while playing Pokemon Go (a new hobby) asking my Higher Power to take my apprehension away. By the time I got home I had absolutely no worries on my mind. In other words I’m going in, getting things done and leaving. I’ve left whatever happens in the hands of my Higher Power.

This all wouldn’t be possible if I wasn’t where I am today. I’m grateful for the things I have in my life. No matter what life throws at me, I don’t have to drink.

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