Full of Gratitude

When I arrived in the city I currently live, I knew one thing above all else – I had to get involved in my recovery. I only have to look at the last year to see how my life as blossomed into what it is today – who I am today. For me, today and every day is only possible because I am sober.

A year ago, I was full of shame, guilt, resentment and fear. Here I was again, despite all my knowledge of recovery, going to rehab. From the time I stepped in the cab until I was dropped off on the doorstep of rehab all I could do is cry. Why are we here again? What happened? What do we need to change? The list was long and I wasn’t sure if I was going to survive another day without a drink.

From the beginning I was told I had a story to tell – I just had to tell it. I had a wealth of knowledge and experience – I just had to use it. Alcoholics don’t like being told what to do. I still don’t sometimes. I had to put everything aside, as best I could, and simply do as I was told. Why? When I had control of my life and did what I wanted to do – how did that work out? It didn’t. It was time to do something different. A month after rehab, on today’s date a year ago, I stepped through the doors to my new life. Now what was I going to do? I got involved in my own sobriety.

I knew the importance of meetings, sponsorship and working the steps. After a month of getting to know my new family, I got a sponsor who took me through the steps. We started from the first page of the Big Book and read every word, paragraph and page. I had other addictions (gambling and codependency) so I sought their Fellowships. It was only through my persistent work I stayed sober “One Day At A Time”.

Time has flown by. All I have to do is look through my front window and there is the house I opened the doors one year ago when I got here. How so much has changed. I am grateful for each and every minute of it.

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